Father's Day Tribute from kb

    Dad’s roles have changed so drastically throughout the ages. Being hunters and gatherers is ingrained in their being. We all have genetic traits we are born with that make us who we are. It's what we do with those God-given traits that determine who we become. Do our mom's and dad's shape us? 100%! As we become adults everyone in our world impacts us if we allow them to. However, we are the ones that ultimately choose our fate, the powers that be will hold our hands along the way, giving us gentle nudges from time to time to lead us down the path that may suit us best. Human beings are fortunate to have free will, some of us on this globe may be freer than others on Earth. Living in the United States we are blessed to have many more freedoms than the vast majority of the planet. Our founding Fathers are the heart and soul of our country, just as our fathers are often the roots of our family trees.

 

    The world of fatherhood may sometimes feel like a punch to the gut or even the balls. Many of the manliest men will crumple to the ground during the birth of their children. Mom’s are able to have a lovely 9 month period to adjust to motherhood. By the time we reach the point of giving birth. Most of us have this insane mix of feelings, ranging from excitement to meet our new baby, fear of all the things that can go wrong, and the dire need to want our bodies back. We endure mass amounts of pain during childbirth but because we are so connected to our children we often endure wreaking this havoc on our bodies not once, but two and three times!! Some of us even more than that. Dad’s are not granted the 9 months of luxurious pregnant bliss. Us moms share our bodies with our teeny tiny offspring. Sure the new dads get to witness our bodies growing with child and the world seems to slowly change around them. But often they wake up and it feels like, bam! They are a dad and the doctor or nurse is handing them a messy newborn, often a misshapen, squirmy little human. I can't imagine how overwhelming it would feel to have to provide for such a small, tiny, and amazing being.

    Father's throughout the ages have gone through many transitions. Dad’s of the ’60s-’70s-'80’s worked very hard establishing families. They often worked long hours away from the home. Which left much pressure on the moms to take on the role of both mom and dad. As well as it was a period where women were making their way into the workforce. Leaving moms exhausted and dads exhausted. It’s not surprising the divorce rate spiked during the ’60s, ’70s, and ’80s.

    When I think about my own dad and many of the dads I was surrounded by growing up, those men, worked their tails off. Looking around at my friends and acquaintances from grade school, high school, and college along with our adult friends. Most of our dads were driven and working hard to take over the world, or at least their world. Providing amazing vacations, not only clean, nice clothing, but often name brands. Many of us had cars, college educations paid for by our parents, we were well-provided for. Our dads wanted to give us the things and experiences they never had growing up. When they couldn’t provide those things for us, they helped us find ways to earn money and provide for ourselves.

    

    They were good role models. No, they were great role models. Were they perfect? No. Are we perfect? No. Each generation tries to learn from the previous one. Wanting to change this or that. Sometimes fixing things that are broken, sometimes breaking things that never needed fixing. We need to take time to thank the dads of old. Those that fought in wars, built businesses, provided for their families, and loved their children unconditionally.

    

    Thank you to the dads of today. Our husbands. These men take on a different role altogether. Truly the first generation of dads with paternity leaves. Allowing them to be dad AND MOM. These dads clean, decorate the home and cook. They help their kids with homework, projects, and navigate the trials of young friendships. They coach, plant gardens, and build playgrounds in their backyards. These dads plan vacations, go on bike rides, drive groups of kids from point A to point B, and back again. Dads of today PLAY with their kids. They encourage them to be who they want to be while teaching them to be strong in what they stand for.

    I am grateful to be married to one of these dads. I am grateful for our dads and what they provided for us. We would not be the people we are today without those men. Our dads are strong role models and leaders. Each generation leads with many amazing qualities. I hope we can continue to learn from the mistakes of our past and plunge forward with the positive aspects and things that worked from each generation.

Many of the dads today have been able to do that. They master the work/home life balance. They spend time with their children, understanding parenting alongside their partners, is a top priority. As well as providing for their families. Whatever that looks like within their family dynamics. These modern dads appreciate their spouses, whether they stay at home with the children or work outside of the home. They are comfortable in their skin regardless if they are the breadwinner or if their partner brings home the majority of the bacon. This is truly a unique, solid, group of men that are raising amazing children!

    

    I can remember as a small child, sitting on my dad’s shoulders, sun-kissed freckled cheeks, brown pigtails bouncing with each step, feeling on top of the world. The view from that height is a memory I will hold forever. There was something about the safety of my dad, holding me. Never for a moment did I consider he could fall, never did I question if he would drop me. We walked along, and I felt safe and happy, content. All of my needs were met in those moments. Memories a billion dollars couldn’t buy or replace.

    

    I have memories of my husband with my small children. Tossing them in the air and the sound of their laughter, shouting again daddy, again!! Never did I think he would drop them, never did I say that’s too high. (Ok fine, maybe I did say, that’s too high, once or twice. But Todd is REALLY strong and he could toss our kids pretty high!!) I always trusted they would return safely into his arms.

    I hope our children today have dads or important people in their circle that provides them with the safety they need and grant them with billion-dollar memories that they will hold dear in their hearts for a lifetime.

    This Father’s Day lets raise our hats to all the dads regardless if they have children or not. Some of our greatest father figures are those brothers, teachers, uncles, coaches, and community members, who provide solid values and are stoic figures. Often standing on the side, yet these men play pivotal roles in the lives of our children today.

    Thank you for your billion dollar self. Please know how much you are valued and appreciated in a world where there is so much conflict. You are invaluable. Happy Father's Day!

P.S. I would love to share a quote from my dad. Although he doesn't own this quote, it's one I grew up hearing him say often and feel like it fits the times.

                                       "Different strokes for different folks"

                                                                        -Muhammed Ali

https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/different-strokes-for-different-folks.html

https://www.dad.info/article/dads-through-the-ages-a-history