Michael Jordan taught me... this is NOT my last dance!
During the Stay-At-Home orders, I would assume many of us spent a fair share of time in front of the TV. I am not a huge TV watcher. However, during this insanely crazy pandemic, I did spend a decent amount of time watching some terrible TV and also, some really inspiring and interesting television shows. The Last Dance was my favorite for so many reasons. If you have not watched it I highly recommend it. (The link is at the bottom of this page.) Having grown up during the Michael Jordan dynasty, I was a Bulls Basketball fan and loved Michael Jordan. My bedroom was plastered with Bulls posters, news clippings, memorabilia, and even Bulls artwork I created. As a basketball player myself, I was a true die-hard fan. Those that followed the Bulls and shared this fascination with Micheal Jordan can relate. Michael Jordan was not just a basketball player. If you watched the documentary you were able to witness the many sides of a person driven to succeed. He was often referred to as superhuman. Having grown up watching him, I loved his competitive desire and determination. He had an infectious magnetic personality that drew people to him from all over the globe. He was more than just an athlete. He gave kids the belief, anything was possible if you work hard enough and above all, believe in yourself and those you surround yourself with. Some people will stand by your side and others will push you to the brink of wanting to give up. Michael Jordan emulated the absolute dire need to strive to be the best. I will share with you some of my trials and tribulations, the things that keep me dancing! Thank you Michael Jordan, this is not my last dance!
I was that tomboy girl, head to toe, thru and thru. My mom kept threatening to cut my bouncing pigtails because more times than not...she couldn't comb through the knots and make those cute pigtails. Eventually, she did follow through with her threats and I had to get a short cut. Mind you this was the 1980's and the feathered look was in. Every hair salon book across the U.S. of A. feature feathered hair and frosted tips. Remember those books you could leaf through while waiting to get your hair cut and styled? Never once could any stylist recreate those looks. Hence why the books no longer exist. 😆 Falling for the same dreams as most, I opted for a feathered cut. However, instead of looking like the famed Farrah Fawcett, I looked a lot more like a young Shaun Cassidy with fang teeth, in desperate need of braces. Okay, okay probably more accurate to go with Todd's description of me, after having seen a childhood photo of me from this era...a brown-eyed Bobby Brady. Yup, freckles and all. At one point my dad made me repeatedly go to the bathroom and "SCRUB" my face because it was still dirty. He finally decided to do it himself. I wasn't doing it properly. He discovered that day, freckles can not be washed off a person's face. That was also the summer my uncle called me Henry. Literally all summer. I could have cared less. I just kept being me. This grubby little spitfire of a girl, with an Eidetic memory, the common sense of a kid living on the streets, not to mention the confidence of a tiger taking down a bear. With the nickname Henry, I had to have confidence and most likely a chip on my shoulder.
Throughout my younger years, my confidence rarely wavered. It wasn't until my 20's that my confidence began to crack. Life's choices, determining the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and being pregnant at 23 with my first child, led to me questioning my abilities as a female human. I began to question who I was and who I was to become as a wife and a mother. When I envisioned myself in these rolls growing up, never once did I doubt myself. However, when actually faced with those jobs, they were far more daunting than I ever imagined. Marriage was supposed to be a fairy tale of happily ever afters and my children were going to be like the little cherubs I babysat for throughout junior high and high school. No one really tells you, your spouse may call you out on things no one else had the courage to do before. The things your parents overlooked because they love you in a way no one else can. They don't tell you your patience will be tried by dirty socks left on the stairs for a week straight, or that some babies have a fussy time EVERY DAY. You're not told that you will oftentimes use the bathroom with a crying baby or forgo a shower, or two because you no longer know how to manage your time and your memory is failing due to lack of sleep. These things aren't supposed to happen when you are a good wife or a good mother. Cracks in your confidence begin to appear and the foundation of who you are comes into question. Not to mention people probably did talk about these things, I just never thought those things would happen to me.
However, even with my cracked and crumbling confidence, I could often be found, music blaring, butt shaking, moving to the music, and creating my own dances. Whether it was in the kitchen; cooking, in the garden; growing, or in the shower; cleaning. (more often cleaning, than actually showering though, haha!) My kids can vouch, on more than one occasion they have asked me to stop singing or dancing and turn the music down. Usually, I dance a little crazier and sing a little louder!
Today's blog was supposed to be more about my career path and give you all some insight into the path that led me to kb FAWN, my Etsy Shop, and some of my goals. However, the tangent led me down an entirely different angle altogether, and I just went with it. Maybe somebody out there today just needs to turn up the tunes and enjoy life, worrying if they are a good wife, mom, sister, or on the flipside, husband, dad, or brother. (Not sure how many male readers I have.) Maybe it was my subliminal mind reminding me to put on my dancing shoes or kick them off and dance barefoot! Our third eye helps guide us through this life, sometimes we need to close our eyes and see things from a different perspective. I hope the kids of today can find a person in their lives that has superhuman qualities to guide them to be the best they can be.
If you're looking for a tune to crank, the tune I have in my brain right now is Kryptonite, by 3 Doors Down. Maybe in another blog, I will share all the laughs and memories that go along with this song. There are too many to count with many different groups of family and friends! Life is about confidence boosters and confidence testers. Never let it be your last dance!
p.s. I can only imagine the laundry list of things men have to adjust to while being married also. Always two lanes on the marriage highway. Just an easier drive when those lanes are going the same direction!
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass;
it's about learning to dance in the rain"
-Vivian Greene
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