Anyone else out there walking in the tall grass?

    Finally, getting back on my path. Recently, I have been walking in the tall grass along side of the path, covered in burrs for most of the month of August! It was a prickly month to say the least. We shall see what September brings. I will share with all of you a little more about me. I have given some tidbits here and there. I shared a little about my husband Todd, and our relationship, A little about our four children, and our insane pets. I've shared some fun childhood memories that included my dad and my mom and some of the values they instilled in me as a young child. I thought it might be fun to share a little more as I am coming closer to opening my Etsy store. The goal is to open this weekend. That being said, I feel like behind each dream is a story. I will share more about mine. 

    The last story about me I shared was the beginning of my child care career at age 10. Babysitting for every home on Hobart Avenue that had children residing there. I dominated the block as the top babysitter...mind you I was the only girl of age to babysit. I remained babysitting all through grade school and high school. However, when I got into my junior year of high school, I started realizing shopping at Kmart and Sears was no longer in my fashion wheelhouse. Because of course in 1991, I knew what fashion was all about. Wearing over sized rugby shirts from Abercrombie & Fitch, plaid men's button-downs, and men's button fly jeans from the Gap, not to mention over sized men's boxers, flannel pajamas pants, and sweatshirts with university logos from across the country... ALL OVERSIZED. Another fashion trend among the late 80's, early 90's was trying to collect Hard Rock Café t's from restaurants across, not only the US, but the globe. Looking back I guess I am not surprised my mom did not want to pay for clothes that made me look like a boy. She had two boys, my two older brothers, she didn't need a third. She had longed for a daughter and she finally had one. Oh my poor mother, I was a tomboy through and through as a child, complete with the nickname Henry. Then moving on to high school, I continued to dress like a boy and cover up as much of my body as possible. She would often refuse to buy the clothes that I wanted to wear. She would claim they were too expensive. As an adult looking back , I am realizing she just didn't like the style and was refusing to support my habit of looking like a boy. I on the other hand was a very bound and determined kid. I decided to get a job at the Gap, so I could buy the men's clothing I found cool, with MY OWN money. So at 16 years old I was babysitting, working at the Gap, and also still working for my parent's roofing company. However, I was no longer picking up nails for pennies. I was running errands for the office crew, during the summers. 

    When I headed off to Purdue University in 1993 my parents thought it would be best if I did not get a job, but focused on schoolwork. In my family the idea of not working was very foreign to me. Within the first few weeks of school I followed their advice and I did not work. However, I did join the polo club and volunteered to take care of our polo ponies, getting up at 4:30am a few days a week to let the ponies out, feed, and water them, before heading to my 7:30am English class. My sophomore year at school I did get a job at Brad's Bagels. You're getting the idea. I am not a person that can sit idly very long and even when I do, I enjoy doing something. 

    I'm not sharing all of this personal info to sit on a high horse or pat myself on the back. My dad was a workaholic. There are definite draw backs to never knowing when to turn it off. He was one of those people. I try to have a work life balance, I am not great at it. 

    I ended up working all thru the rest of college in restaurants or bars, I worked an internship at an art gallery in the River West area of Chicago, when I transferred to DePaul University. After getting married and having kids. I continued working in the restaurant industry. It was the best way for me to stay home with Trevor and Clay during the day when they were small. I was able to feel like a stay at home mom, yet still working and trying to help provide. Periodically I continued to work at my parents business. After we had the girls, our family quickly went from two children to four children, our expenses were mounting. Our family had grown, our house had not. We were trying to make all ends meet and send four children to our local private school. I decided it was time to get a real, big girl, daytime job with a real salary. And that I did. I landed an amazing job at New England Financial, a subsidiary of MetLife. I was a registered representative. Fully licensed, helping my clients prepare for retirement, grow their assets, or determine ways they could reduce costs and better their financial situations. It was an amazing experience, and I worked my tail off! 

    Then the unthinkable happened, my brother died suddenly of a massive heart attack. Leaving behind six small children and his wife. It was life altering to his kids and my brother's wife. My parents were never the same afterwards. It brought about an unbelievable amount tragedy to our immediate and extended family. I began to look at life differently and what was important to me. I took a leave from my job, I got fat, and preoccupied with family drama. The world was spinning around, and some things were falling into place and others continued to spin amuck. Somehow, the world eventually rights itself, leaving some things better than they were before and others never the same again. All of these things shape the person I am. 

    So how does all of this pertain to my Etsy store, kb FAWN? Because life is about the stories. It's about the values we pass down to our kids, or as an education professional, what I pass down to the students I work with. As a person on this planet, it's my interactions with the people that surround me. My product is not about the items I will be selling, but what it represents for me, my family, and for Todd's family. Don't get me wrong it is truly a great product also. However, nowadays it's not as often talents and traditions are passed down generation to generation. So as I trudge through the tall grass, in a world that is spinning like that damn spinny thing at the park, shooting people off to other planets in my imagination. We as humans will wander off the path, or choose another path. However, when we slow down and listen inward. The hand of God reaches down and plops us right back on the path we're supposed to be on. All we have to do is stand up, take some time to remove the burrs and move onward. 

p.s. When Tegan read the title of this blog she told me, "the Tall Grass" is a scary movie! Between the bat in my mom's fireplace and the snakes in her basement, August was not too far from a horror flick. Those are stories for another blog. 

p.p.s After looking it up, I am blown away. "The Tall Grass" is a Stephen King book, and the storyline is quite interesting in the parallels of this blog, in regards to finding the right path and faith. Looks like I know what I'll be reading next!

           "We're all here for a reason."

          --Ross Humboldt--the Tall Grass